A Way to Peace: The Charter for Compassion

December 28, 2017 Off By Deby Jizi

“The principle of compassion lies at the heart of all religious, ethical and spiritual traditions, calling us always to treat all others as we wish to be treated ourselves. Compassion impels us to work tirelessly to alleviate the suffering of our fellow creatures, to dethrone ourselves from the centre of our world and put another there, and to honour the inviolable sanctity of every single human being, treating everybody, without exception, with absolute justice, equity and respect.” The first paragraph from The Charter for Compassion

In a few days we will be ringing in a new year. I’ve been on a quest for the past few years to find out what is true for me and then doing my best to live that truth. I’ve had to look back at my life to events I probably would rather forget, to actions I wish I had never taken, and to beliefs that I had adopted but were not my own. What I was looking for was truth. Not “a” truth or capital T-H-E truth, but truth that I could sink my heart and soul into, a truth that I could live by.

Since 1997 the words “inner peace” have been a strong part of my vocabulary. They have guided my search for what I wanted most, peace, first in my life, my family’s life, and ultimately, the world. Twenty years ago, those words were the guiding principle of my spiritual search, but I was grasping at straws in the dark because I didn’t know who I was or what I believed. The dogma of my childhood had caused me more pain than joy, so I had turned away from it completely.

That act was equivalent to “throwing the baby out with the bath water,” because everything I had known was gone, and I had nothing to replace it with. I sought other spiritual traditions, especially those without the need to believe in a deity. They have been helpful, but I didn’t have to look farther than my own experience and the spiritual leader of my childhood, Jesus, to find the best starting point for my search.

I recall a painting of Jesus in the nursery of my first church, standing with children at his feet, while he held a small child in his arms. I was taught the song, “Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so,” and “Jesus loves all the children of the world,” as early as preschool. I had a great beginning in understanding the man that inspired a world religion. I understood him to be loving, kind, compassionate, and caring.

However, as I grew, the messages I got through my religion moved away from Jesus and towards obscure texts that allowed followers to judge others, exclude them, and even vilify them. Nothing struck me harder than my own experience when I was 18.

I met a wonderful person. We fell in love almost at first sight, if not then. I couldn’t wait for my family to meet him. In fact, two days later he was at my house with my dad grilling us steaks and my mom fixing salads and baked potatoes. I just knew they would love him as much as I did.

They were polite and kind, and everything went smoothly that night. However, as it became clearer that our relationship was getting serious, religion became a sticking point and a serious one. What became clear in a short period of time was that I was in the position of having to make a choice between my family’s love and this new love I had found. I knew my love for him was real, but I was not ready to lose my family, so with a broken heart, I ended it.

For a year and a half I wrestled with this decision. I spent time alone. I prayed. I even went to a Bible college to please my mother. In time, I could not reconcile my decision to end a love that I knew to be real and what I really wanted in my life, and after a time of healing, we reunited. We married soon after and in time had four children together.

I thought that was the end of my struggle, but it was not. We had married agreeing to respect each other’s religious/spiritual paths, and that is what we did, but when I faced adversity, struggles, and stress, I didn’t know how to handle them. What was my guiding principle? What were the ethical guides I would follow?

The answer to those questions only came after I veered way off of the path of who I thought I was, behaving in ways that make me cringe today. I did not have a guiding principle.

But now I do.

It was there all along.

Jesus taught it.

“Love your neighbor as yourself.” The Golden Rule.

If I had heeded this edict all my life, so many things would be different now. If we love our neighbor, we wouldn’t hurt anyone, with words or deeds.

I know this is a practice, and I am human, but it is so simple that it takes my breath away. I always held the belief that if God actually created religions there is no way someone so wise would make religion so complicated. People make it complicated. I was right.

There is nothing simpler than, “Do to others what you would like for them to do to you,” or put another way by Confucius, “Don’t do to anyone what you wouldn’t want them to do to you.”

This is compassion in action.

The Golden Rule is a major principle of the top 21 religious groups active today. It’s call, compassion, is as the charter states above, “…at the heart of all ethical, religious, and spiritual traditions..”

I don’t need 10 tips, or 14 rules, or 100 guidelines of how to go about life. Those might be helpful in working on this one principal, but it all boils down to loving yourself and loving others. Don’t hurt yourself, and don’t hurt others.

This new year, I am signing The Charter for Compassion. I am committing to practicing compassion for myself and for all of my fellow beings.